Nails.

Mar. 12th, 2026 04:12 pm
geosynonyms: (Gilles)
[personal profile] geosynonyms
 Historically we have had very short nails all of the time. Because I get nervous or anxious and pick at them. Also because I hate the feeling of nails hitting and touching things. It's a sensory nightmare. So I just keep them incredibly short. It is also a lesbian joke, because I am a butch lesbian and short nails are a lesbian stereotype at this point.

 Well, we are dating another butch right now, so Monet has taken the reigns from me and we've become distinctly femme for them (myself as a butch and Monet as a femme has caused for our bodily appearance to be very..... futch. Very bigender, I would say, although we hesitate to claim any label about some Collective Gender at all). We had them in our arms, running our fingers through their hair, and Monet had an intense rage at the state of our nails. They were too short, they weren't good enough to give a proper head scratch to our partner. 

So she has decided to grow them out. She did not consult me in this, she did not take into account my life-long sensory issues with nails.

It's been about two weeks now, and I think I'm going to go mad. I want to trim them so so horribly, I think about my nails almost every waking moment. But every time I reach to do it, Monets comes down to slap my metaphorical hand away. I can not physically complete the task. My nails remain untrimmed. 

She also bought a pumice stone foot scrub and got rid of all of the callouses on our feet that I had worked so hard to achieve! She clearly does not care about the Great Foot Blanching of summer '25. I do not care as much about those, really, but it is something that just happened. Right around the same time as the Nail Decision. 

I can't be too upset with her. I've been able to indulge in butch identity and masculinity for years. Our butch is one of the few safe spaces were Monet can be a femme without the fears of cishetero gender coming down onto her. I, as a butch, deflect cishet standards by default. I can push them away without effort. Monet, as a femme, can not do so as easily. Her being able to exist in material space is very important. I just really hate how that also means I have to refrain from clipping my nails. 

Alas, perhaps as a butch is my duty to endure uncomfortable things for the sake of a femme.

(Monet is calling me a weak bitch who just needs to suck it up) 

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